Dream meaning
Sexual dreams
The short answer
Sexual dreams are among the most common dreams people report and rarely mean you want that exact person or act. They tend to reflect desire in a broad sense: closeness, attention, power, or a quality you admire in the other person. They are normal at every age and in every relationship status.
76.5% of people in the study had had this dream. More common in men: 85.0%, against 73.0% of women. No. 2 of the 55 typical dreams · Nielsen et al., 2003
What does a dream about “Sexual dreams” mean?
What psychologists say
Dream research treats sexual content as an ordinary part of dream life. Content-analysis studies find it in a small share of individual dreams but in most people's dream history. Under the continuity hypothesis, these dreams track what is on your mind, including attraction, tension in a relationship or simply the body's own rhythms during REM sleep, when genital arousal happens regardless of dream content.
Hall & Van de Castle, 1966; Schredl & Hofmann, 2003
The Jungian reading
A Jungian reading looks at union rather than sex. A dream partner can stand for a quality you are trying to integrate, the anima or animus, the inner image of the other sex. Dreaming of intimacy with an unexpected person may say more about what they represent to you, such as confidence, freedom or tenderness, than about them.
Jung, 1964
In history and folklore
Freud made sexual wishes central to his theory of dreams, though he argued they appear mostly in disguise rather than openly. Old dream books often read erotic dreams as omens of luck in love or money, a sign of how long people have tried to make sense of them.
Freud, 1900
How common is this dream?
76.5% of people in the study had had this dream. More common in men: 85.0%, against 73.0% of women. From a survey of 1,181 first-year university students in three Canadian cities. No. 2 of the 55 typical dreams.
Common versions of this dream
What if I dream about someone other than my partner?
This is very common and is not a sign of infidelity. The person usually stands for something: novelty, a quality you miss, or simply someone who was on your mind that day.
What if the dream is with someone I dislike or shouldn't be with?
Dreams combine people and feelings loosely. Discomfort on waking often points to a quality of that person you are wrestling with, not to hidden attraction.
Why do I feel guilty after these dreams?
Guilt usually reflects your waking values, not something you did. Dreams are not choices, and noticing what the dream stirred can be more useful than judging it.
Dreams that often come with it
Had this dream? Tell it to Oneiros.
Oneiros reads your own dream, not a dictionary entry: what it was about, how it felt and what it may mean for you, and it notices when it comes back.
Oneiros offers reflective readings for self-discovery and entertainment. It is not a medical or psychological service.
Sources
- Nielsen, T. A., Zadra, A. L., Simard, V., Saucier, S., Stenstrom, P., Smith, C., & Kuiken, D. (2003). The typical dreams of Canadian university students. Dreaming, 13(4), 211–235. doi:10.1023/B:DREM.0000003144.40929.0b
- Hall, C. S., & Van de Castle, R. L. (1966). The Content Analysis of Dreams. Appleton-Century-Crofts.
- Schredl, M., & Hofmann, F. (2003). Continuity between waking activities and dream activities. Consciousness and Cognition, 12(2), 298–308. doi:10.1016/S1053-8100(02)00072-7
- Jung, C. G. (Ed.) (1964). Man and His Symbols. Aldus Books.
- Freud, S. (1900). The Interpretation of Dreams. (Typical dreams are discussed mainly in chapters V and VI.)